Promiscuous Princess

Losing My Secondary Virginity

"Bryson"

Round One:

Well, shortly after joining AFF, I got my  first pursuer. Very flirty and seductive texts for a while. Lots of purple devil emojis. Nerves tight as a drum in a very good way. So, set up a meeting.

Lives near me, so planned on going to his place. Just so nervous, stopped on the way and got a bottle of my favorite wine, Apothic Dark. Wasn't even this nervous the very first time. It was as if I had forgotten everything I ever knew and feeling naive. But, makes sense after a nine year draught.

Got there, and know I was shaking with nerves. Got through the door, stammering about GPS not working. Didn't even have time to set my things down, he took them from me and grasped me, pulling me tight. Heart pounding. Passionate kissing and nudging away from the door. Before I knew it, he is behind me playfully pushing me through the house. Ended up stopped halfway through at the kitchen, where my sweater ends up being tossed on the kitchen table. More playful pushing with added mischievous laughter.

Pass through the bedroom door, and can hear my heartbeat in my burning ears. Feel high, like bees buzzing all around me. Am passionately and playfully pushed onto the bed. RUSH! But soon have company. Making out with an eagerness that hearkens back to my teen years. Almost worry about being caught.

Tank top gets tossed across the room, am bare breasted. Pinching and nibbling that sets bolts of electricity throughout my body. Harder, then harder, maybe too hard, maybe not. New thing. Grasps me between my legs over my jeans, and makes a strong upward thrust. Breath catches in my throat as I sigh. I can tell that I am hot, wet, and hard. Hand slips under the dangerous side of my waistband. May I get corny and quote Madonna “like a virgin”, so felt that way. Took me back to my very first time being touched, so heady.

Fingers loop under my waistband and tug. I lift my hips, heart beating so strong in my ears that I can't hear anything else. Now I am completely nude lying across his bed. Never felt so vulnerable, but in a good, submissive, here I am for you, way. Lies next to me and begins strumming my fiddle. Never before so wet. Whispers in my ear “feels like someone is going to come for me tonight”. Understatement of the century.

Teetering on the edge when he moves his way down my body and cozies in. Oh my God, haven't had this in so long. Had forgotten how velvety soft such intimate kisses felt. Before I know it, my ultimate peak hits me and I lose control. Let loose with such abandon that his neighbors probably needed a cigarette.

Now he's laying back saying his turn. Well, haven't had this in so long either, and is just as much of a pleasure for me. Had forgotten how “delicious” this was too. Stiffness yet softness. Hot and velvety. Salty and musky. Dribbles so tasty. Then he says, better stop now.

Goes to the foot of the bed, grabs my legs, and give me a good strong jerk to the edge. Yee haw! Now, at the imminent moment, near a heart attack. Feel the tip of penetration and want nothing more in this world. Coupling becomes complete, and OMG, never a more perfect moment. Just cannot explain the bliss. He reaches his peak, and OMG, LOVE this moment! Love the receiving ever bit as much as he loves the giving. Cannot imagine a better drug.

Cuddle in an unbelievable blissful afterglow state for a while before it gets late and I need to head home. OH MY GOD!!! About an hour after getting home, and still trembling. So blissed out that I probably won't sleep. Just going “OH DAMN, OH DAMN” all the way home. Didn't even shower. Would every now and then catch a whiff of him, catch a rush, and just not want to leave that.

So happy, so content, so pleased, so blissed out. Drank the wine with relish and then finally drifted off. On Cloud Nine. About time!

Losing My Secondary Virginity

“Bryson”:

Round One:

Well, shortly after joining AFF, I got my first pursuer. Very flirty and seductive texts for a while. Lots of purple devil emojis. Nerves tight as a drum in a very good way. So, set up a meeting.

Lives near me, so planned on going to his place. Just so nervous, stopped on the way and got a bottle of my favorite wine, Apothic Dark. Wasn’t even this nervous the very first time. It was as if I had forgotten everything I ever knew and feeling naive. But, makes sense after a nine year draught.

Got there, and know I was shaking with nerves. Got through the door, stammering about GPS not working. Didn’t even have time to set my things down, he took them from me and grasped me, pulling me tight. Heart pounding. Passionate kissing and nudging away from the door. Before I knew it, he is behind me playfully pushing me through the house. Ended up stopped halfway through at the kitchen, where my sweater ends up being tossed on the kitchen table. More playful pushing with added mischievous laughter.

Pass through the bedroom door, and can hear my heartbeat in my burning ears. Feel high, like bees buzzing all around me. Am passionately and playfully pushed onto the bed. RUSH! But soon have company. Making out with an eagerness that hearkens back to my teen years. Almost worry about being caught.

Tank top gets tossed across the room, am bare breasted. Pinching and nibbling that sets bolts of electricity throughout my body. Harder, then harder, maybe too hard, maybe not. New thing. Grasps me between my legs over my jeans, and makes a strong upward thrust. Breath catches in my throat as I sigh. I can tell that I am hot, wet, and hard. Hand slips under the dangerous side of my waistband. May I get corny and quote Madonna “like a virgin”, so felt that way. Took me back to my very first time being touched, so heady.

Fingers loop under my waistband and tug. I lift my hips, heart beating so strong in my ears that I can’t hear anything else. Now I am completely nude lying across his bed. Never felt so vulnerable, but in a good, submissive, here I am for you, way. Lies next to me and begins strumming my fiddle. Never before so wet. Whispers in my ear “feels like someone is going to come for me tonight”. Understatement of the century.

Teetering on the edge when he moves his way down my body and cozies in. Oh my God, haven’t had this in so long. Had forgotten how velvety soft such intimate kisses felt. Before I know it, my ultimate peak hits me and I lose control. Let loose with such abandon that his neighbors probably needed a cigarette.

Now he’s laying back saying his turn. Well, haven’t had this in so long either, and is just as much of a pleasure for me. Had forgotten how “delicious” this was too. Stiffness yet softness. Hot and velvety. Salty and musky. Dribbles so tasty. Then he says, better stop now.

Goes to the foot of the bed, grabs my legs, and give me a good strong jerk to the edge. Yee haw! Now, at the imminent moment, near a heart attack. Feel the tip of penetration and want nothing more in this world. Coupling becomes complete, and OMG, never a more perfect moment. Just cannot explain the bliss. He reaches his peak, and OMG, LOVE this moment! Love the receiving ever bit as much as he loves the giving. Cannot imagine a better drug.

Cuddle in an unbelievable blissful afterglow state for a while before it gets late and I need to head home. OH MY GOD!!! About an hour after getting home, and still trembling. So blissed out that I probably won’t sleep. Just going “OH DAMN, OH DAMN” all the way home. Didn’t even shower. Would every now and then catch a whiff of him, catch a rush, and just not want to leave that.

So happy, so content, so pleased, so blissed out. Drank the wine with relish and then finally drifted off. On Cloud Nine. About time!

Where It All Begins

Well, things have been really rough for me for a long time.

Husband of 17 years recently passed away, actually on September 11^th, of all days. He died after an extended illness. He had diabetes all his life that he never took care of. Developed many complications, dialysis, amputation, becoming bedridden. I devoted myself to this man for about a year of total bed care, wound care, home hemo-dialysis, incontenince and cleaning from that, hand feeding, being woke several times a night, you name it. I have never been so completely and totally in love with someone ever before. I take marriage vows seriously, and in sickness and health, for better or worse. So, I plugged in for the long haul.

Then came the night. He called for me, had messed his bed pad. I was trying to tug it out from under him, and heard a few gurgly breaths. Went up to his head, and the vacant stare in his eyes was imistakable. Still yet, any possible chance, so called 911. They talked me through CPR, all the while I can feel his chest and ribs sinking under my hands. EMTs get there and somewhat stabilize him and take him to the hospital. Follow along, for him to only “officially” die a few hours later. Had I for sure known, I would have left him lying. Things just numb and shock for the longest time.  One expects to lose a spouse late in live, but being a 48yo widow just makes you feel like life cheated you.  I have this feeling that life owes me a payback for being cheated so.

I become so lonely that I try to do the match.com thing, but it becomes clear that I am emotionally unavailable. Does not mean that all of me is unavailable. Way back, several several years, husband and I used to swing some as a couple. So, decide this is just the thing I need instead of any messy emotional entanglements, and join AFF on November 14^th.

Sex is a complicated issue for me. Never one for the “oh, only if you are in love, only with one man, only in a commitment, only for the long haul”. Going way back, have always been in tune with my rampant sexual side. Feel no qualms over having sex just for sex's sake, just because I'm in the mood and the opportunity presents itself. Sex has always been an emotional and physical comfort for me, even if I have no emotions for the person. Always been highly sexed. Add to this the fact that all throughout my childhood, I was the social pariah, the “it” that everyone loved to abuse. I have tales that could bring tears to your eyes. So I know on a psychological back-burner basis, a lot of my promiscuity stems from a need for approval, especially from men. Took me a long time to realize this, but doesn't really change anything. Still loving sex anytime I can get it, so always succumb. Life is just too short to deprive oneself. Mom is a bit repressed, saying the same old song and dance, must be in a commitment, don't have to give in just because you are aroused. But hey, that's no fun! She says don't understand how I can have sex with someone I just met, but my question is if you are both attracted and aroused, then how do you NOT? To try not to would feel like a punishment to me.

So anyway, this blog is about recounting all of my heady encounters, because I am about to explode, and really have no one nonjudgmental to confide in. A sort-of diary, if you will. Hope readers get the same release that I do.